Changing the World

In 2006, Kellie O'Brien and her daughter, Heather, traveled to Africa to volunteer at a convent in Sanya Ju, Tanzania.  With so much hardship around them, they felt impelled to give away much of the clothing and money they had with them.  At the end of the day, however, they knew they had not made a lasting difference.  When asked how they could, the sisters told them about a Massai man named Gabriel who had come to the convent for the last five years, asking for a school.  Even then, Kellie O'Brien knew that her life was about to change.

[and more from Costco Magazine, December 2013]

Harold Ramis

The world of movies and the world of comedy has lost a legend as actor and comedian Harold Ramis has died at the age of 69. The actor had been suffering from a number of health issues in recent years and finally succumbed to his battle with them on Monday.
Per the Chicago Tribune:

Ramis, a longtime North Shore resident, was surrounded by family when he died at 12:53 a.m. from complications of autoimmune inflammatory vasculitis, a rare disease that involves swelling of the blood vessels, his wife Erica Mann Ramis said. He was 69.

Ramis is perhaps best known for his work in 80s comedies with his collaborators Bill Murray and Dan Aykroyd. The trio helped create some of the classic comedies we revere today such as Ghostbusters, Caddyshack and Stripes. He also has writing credits on such classics as Animal House, Meatballs and Groundhog Day.

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Reactions

[via facebook]

10 Obvious Truths

well, maybe not so obvious (or obvious after the fact)

You know how you can hear something a hundred times in a hundred different ways before it finally gets to you?  The ten truths listed below fall firmly into that category - life lessons that many of us learned years ago, and have been reminded of ever since, but for whatever reason, haven't fully grasped.

-- via facebook

The Country Doctor weighs in

The 1909 film Country Doctor was a tear-jerker in which a small-town American physician was torn between staying bedside with his gravely ill daughter and helping others who equally needed his services.

That brings me to the story of Marc Shlachter, M.D., self-styled “Country Doctor” of Hauula and Laie. Very small-town American doctor.

He’s from Cleveland (where I was born and lived through age 7), and if you’re curious how he came here, it’s pretty simple:

“From watching the 1961 movie Gidget Goes Hawaiian at a high school graduation party.”

I’ve known the doc since he came to Hauula 43 years ago and I lived in Punaluu, when he had to dump the usual doctor’s exam table and use a butcher’s block to handle his weighty, mostly Polynesian patients. When he got paid in taro, fish, chickens and cooked food. Was inaugurated as a Samoan chief. When he married a local Filipina and raised two children, divorced, married again to a woman from Japan, who now manages his office and his money – the latter being what he’s worst at.

Wherever you go with him in Hauula-Laie, people shout, “Hey, Dr. Shlachter!” The Chinese restaurant in Laie Shopping Center carries a vegetarian “Dr. Shlachter Special.”

I was curious what the Country Doctor, who was featured on MidWeek‘s cover back in 1994, thinks about Obamacare and the limits on Medicare reimbursements. And what does this physician with so many patients who will never access HealthCare.gov on the Internet think of the state of our health care system?

“The premise that every American should have health coverage should be a right,” Shlachter says. “The changes that already exist are very good, such as a child staying under the parents’ plan through age 26. And that physical exams and wellness checks are a covered service.

“I believe the country would be much better off with a universal payer like Medicare for everyone, with the federal government or the state contributing to the premiums for indigents. Having multiple insurance companies competing with each other drives up the cost – for example, the five Quest insurers here for indigents.

“The argument that mandatory health care insurance is a form of communism is hogwash. No one says mandatory auto insurance for all drivers is communism. I believe non-competitive health insurance with (one payer) would save the country much money that can be used for other things.”

Shlachter says he didn’t end up making much money out there in Hauula and Laie, and his home phone rings at all odd hours – just like the doctors’ home phones of old days.

But there in “the country” he’s an icon and a family friend, not just a health provider.

And in 43 years, there haven’t been many illnesses, diseases or injuries he’s not seen, diagnosed and treated.

That – rather than the money – used to be what drew our young people into the medical profession.

-- Bob Jones, MidWeek, February 5, 2014

habits of the mentally strong

In 1914, Thomas Edison's lab burned down, and years' worth of his work was destroyed. This could easily be described as the worst thing to happen to Edison, but the inventor instead chose to see it as an energizing opportunity that forced him to rebuild and re-examine much of his work. Edison reportedly said at the time: "Thank goodness all our mistakes were burned up. Now we can start again fresh."

"In a world that we don't control, tolerance is obviously an asset," Ryan Holiday, author of the forthcoming The Obstacle Is The Way, told The Huffington Post. "But the ability to find energy and power from what we don't control is an immense competitive advantage."

He's talking about mental strength, a difficult-to-define psychological concept that encompasses emotional intelligence, grit, resilience, self-control, mental toughness and mindfulness. It's something that Edison had in spades, and it's the reason that some people are able to overcome any obstacle, while others crumble at life's daily challenges and frustrations.

The ability to cope with difficult emotions and situations is a significant predictor of our success and happiness. The most capable individuals in this way are able to turn any obstacle into a source of growth and opportunity. And while much has been made of what mentally strong people avoid doing -- things like dwelling on the past, resenting the success of others and feeling sorry for themselves -- what do they actually do? What tactics do they use to overcome adversity time and time again?

"Things that we think are obstacles are actually opportunities to do something," says Holiday. "[To] be rewarded in some way that we never would have expected, provided that we address and don't shirk from that obstacle."

Here are 9 essential habits and practices of mentally strong people that can help you get through any challenge or hardship.

[via facebook]

14 Things Your Children Can Teach You

One windy, rainy day my cheap umbrella was blown inside out, leaving me drenched and furious.  Muttering under my breath, I wrestled the umbrella closed and jammed it into the trash.  Just then a small girl and her father walked by.  Her little red umbrella had also been blown inside out.  Instead of becoming angry, the girl smiled, "Look Daddy, a giant flower," she said.  I realized then, I needed to lighten up.

Whether it is making the most of a bad situation or discovering wonderment in the ordinary world, children have their own way of teaching adults as much as we teach them.  But many of us are so wrapped up in our day-to-day lives that this wisdom is wasted.  So we took the time to talk to some perceptive parents, educators and other people who work with youngsters.  Their observations provide some subtle and not so subtle lessons for all of us.

The power of perseverance.  Susan Van Zant, a 52-year old grandmother and elementary school principal in San Diego, remembers one of her most influential "teachers," a 9 year-old named Brian, who has cerebral palsy.  When Brian entered the school's charity jogathon., Van Zant assumed he would use his wheelchair, but Brian had planned a surprise for his classmates.  "He had been undergoing occupational therapy and learned to walk with a walker.  He waited until that day to show the other kids," says Van Zant.

Each step Brian took was enormously difficult and sweat poured down his face as he made his way around the track.  "He stumbled and fell, but he got back up again," recalls Van Zant.  "After he went around once,we thought he would stop, but he said he wanted to like everyone else and insisted on doing it for a whole hour.  He was an inspiration to us all.

Money isn't everything.  Carole Kennedy, 54, an elementary-school principal in Columbia, Missouri, recalls preparing for a field trip to St. Louis with her students.  Kennedy, whose school serves many children from low-income families, bought a new outfit for one second grader who didn't have many nice clothes.  "We thought she'd be delighted, but she wouldn't accept the gift," says Kennedy.  "She was comfortable with who she was and if she didn't have things as good as everybody else, that was fine."  The episode also taught Kennedy that "the really important issue is the love of family, not trying to keep up with the Joneses."

It's OK to ask for help.  While adults often think asking for help is a sign of weakness, children know not only is it smart, but seeking the assistance of others can make them stronger.

Robin Capecci, 36, a social worker at St. Christopher's Hospital for Children in Philadelphia, learned this from Jessica, a 15-year old patient who was dying of cancer.  Jessica came to Capecci for advice on how to discuss her condition with her family.  "She wanted to reassure them that they would be OK, but she didn't know how," says Capecci.

Since speaking with Jessica, Capecci has been better able to come forward when she feels overwhelmed.  "Jessica didn't want anyone to think she was weak in any way, but she taught me that it was OK to turn to someone else to talk."

-- by Stephanie Dolgoff, Women's Day 3/14/95

Sid Caesar

Sid Caesar, one of the first stars created by television via his weekly live comedy program “Your Show of Shows,” died Wednesday at his home in Beverly Hills after a brief illness. He was 91.

A two-time Emmy winner, Caesar (above in a photo with Red Buttons and Mickey Rooney) and his partner Imogene Coca broke comedic ground with the 90-minute live program: It didn’t rely on vaudeville or standup material but rather on long skits and sketches written by an impressive roster of comedy writers including Mel Brooks, Woody Allen, Neil Simon, Larry Gelbart, Carl Reiner, Lucille Kallen and Mel Tolkin.

Reiner said Caesar had an ability to “connect with an audience and make them roar with laughter.”

“Sid Caesar set the template for everybody,” Reiner told KNX-AM in Los Angeles. “He was without a doubt the greatest sketch comedian-monologist that television ever produced. He could ad lib. He could do anything that was necessary to make an audience laugh.”

“Your Show of Shows” was “different from other programs of its time because its humor was aimed at truth,” Simon once observed. “Other television shows would present situations with farcical characters; we would put real-life people into identifiable situations.”

Shirley Temple

(CNN) -- Shirley Temple Black, who rose to fame as arguably the most popular child star in Hollywood history, died late Monday night, her publicist said.

She was 85.

Temple Black, who also enjoyed a long career as a diplomat, died of natural causes at her Woodside, California, home. She was surrounded by family and caregivers, a statement from Cheryl Kagan said.

She began acting at age 3 and became a massive box-office draw before turning 10, commanding a then-unheard of salary of $50,000 per movie.

Her first film of notice was in 1932 when she played in "War Babies," part of the "Baby Burlesks" series of short films.

For about 18 years, she sang, tap-danced and acted her way into the hearts of millions. Her corkscrew curls were popular with little girls from the 1930s through the 1970s.

Early years

Her star shone brightest as a toddler, and 20th Century Fox cranked out a series of feature films with the adorable, talented little girl. Her hits included "Little Miss Marker" (1934), "Curly Top" (1935) and "The Littlest Rebel" (1935).

At the box office, she beat out the great adult stars of her day, such as Clark Gable and Bing Crosby. Her popularity spawned a large array of merchandizing items, such as dolls, hats and dresses.

She was the top box-office star four years in a row, from 1935 to 1938. Her career was at its peak as the country was suffering the effects of the Great Depression, and her films offered uplifting moments.

She retired from filmmaking at 22 and married Charles Black, changing her last name from Temple to Temple Black.

But she did not fade from the public eye.

She embarked on a new career as a foreign diplomat: She served in the U.S. delegation to the United Nations from 1969 to 1974 was U.S. ambassador to Ghana from 1974 to 1976, and U.S. ambassador to Czechoslovakia from 1989 to 1992.

the Bezos factors (traits of success)

When Jeff Bezos was a child, he dreamed of being the next Thomas Edison. Today, he's the multibillionaire founder and CEO of Amazon.com (NASDAQ: AMZN) , with personal ambitions geared toward outer space, financing a clock that measures time for 10,000 years, and, perhaps equally ambitious, supplanting Wal-Mart (NYSE: WMT) at the top of the retail food chain.

How did he go from being an admittedly accomplished child to one of our generation's greatest (and richest) entrepreneurs? And, more specifically, are there lessons we can draw from his experience to increase our own chance at success in the future?

I believe the answer to the latter question is yes. As I highlight in the following list of factors underlying Bezos' stratospheric ascent, as recounted by Brad Stone in The Everything Store: Jeff Bezos and the Age of Amazon, while luck and genetics certainly positioned the Amazon founder for success, other traits such as confidence, work ethic, and a fierce independence are both critical to explaining his rise and largely replicable by others.

1. LuckTo a certain extent, every great entrepreneur is a product of luck -- that is, of their specific time and place of birth.

"Shortly before or very shortly after 1840 were born nearly all the galaxy of uncommon men who were to be the overlords of the future society," Matthew Josephson wrote nearly 80 years ago in The Robber Barons, a book about the scions of the Gilded Age. By coming into their own on the heels of the Civil War, these men were uniquely positioned to capture the wealth from the postwar industrial revolution.

The same can be said of Bill Gates, the founder and longtime CEO of Microsoft, who was born on the eve of the computing revolution and attended a private middle school that had only recently started a computer club. "It was an amazing thing, of course, because this was 1968," Malcolm Gladwell wrote in Outliers: The Story of Success. "Most colleges didn't have computer clubs in the 1960s."

Even Warren Buffett's current station in life can be attributed in part to happenstance. Born in 1930, he was too young to be burdened with memories of the Crash of 1929 or the Great Depression, yet old enough to ride the epic wave of prosperity that followed World War II and ignited one of the greatest bull markets in history.

Bezos is no exception here. Beyond his considerable intellect and skill set, it simply can't be denied that he was of the age (late 20s) and ability to exploit the Internet revolution of the mid-1990s.

2. IntelligenceThat Bezos has been lucky, however, doesn't detract from his own talents and abilities. "A lot of what we ascribe to luck is not luck at all," Starbucks (NASDAQ: SBUX  ) CEO Howard Schultz wrote in Pour Your Heart Into It. "It's seizing the day and accepting responsibility for your future."

To Schultz's point, of the roughly 4 million babies to be born in 1964, there was only one Jeff Bezos. Only one person thought of Amazon. Only one person threw caution to the wind, abandoned a lucrative Wall Street career, and drove cross-country to make his dream a reality. And only one person had the emotional fortitude to stare down the likes of Wal-Mart and Barnes & Noble in order to see the vision through to completion.

What made Bezos "the one"? Perhaps more than anything, it's his uniquely keen and "hyper-rational" intellect. He was a standout pupil in elementary school, the valedictorian of his high-school class, and a summa cum laude graduate of Princeton University. He sprinted through the ranks at D.E. Shaw, one of the earliest and still most sophisticated quantitative hedge funds on Wall Street.

Three decades ago, when a teacher of his was asked to estimate 12-year-old Bezos' grade level, she responded: "I really can't say, except that there is probably no limit to what he can do, given a little guidance."

3. Work ethicLayered on top of this intellect has been a fierce work ethic that's propelled by Bezos' intense ability to focus and strong underlying discipline.

At one point, Bezos announced to his high-school class that he intended to be the valedictorian, Stone recounts. After that, it became a race to be No. 2. "Jeff decided he wanted it and he worked harder than anybody else," recalled a friend of Bezos' from the time.

At D.E. Shaw, he kept a sleeping bag in his office and a makeshift mattress pad on his windowsill for nights that he chose to sleep at the office. At Amazon, one of his guiding principles is that "you can work long, you can work hard, you can work smart, but at Amazon you can't choose two out of the three."


"He was excruciatingly focused," said the same friend. "Not like mad-scientist focused, but he was capable of really focusing, in a crazy way, on certain things."

[That's the main three.  The other seven are somewhat redundant to me.  For more, read Outliers.]

become the change

I've come to strongly believe that you cannot change others, for better or worse.  So what I have decided to do is become the change I wish to see in others through action.

I find that people have to want to change themselves, and without experiencing some kind of epiphany will likely remain the way they are for the rest of their lives. Trying too hard to change people will often drive them further away from you, and closer to whatever it is you're trying to get them to avoid. This is because people naturally get defensive when others - especially those closest to them - question their decisions or lifestyle. If you're trying to effect change in someone you become an external force which inevitably puts the other party in a position to internalize their feelings and emotions.

I realized this many years ago when dealing with my own mother. ...

becoming exceptional

How can people like you and I can become exceptional in our own right -- both in terms of investing (as The Motley Fool is an investing site) and in life more generally?

As I promised at the beginning, the answer to this is much simpler and easier to implement than one might think. This is because each day presents you with a series of otherwise infinitesimal challenges -- i.e., opportunities -- that can be used to differentiate yourself from the pack.

Giving up your seat on the subway for the older woman who just boarded. Not retaliating when you're cut off on the freeway. Not yelling at your children in those inevitable moments when chaos ensues. Or, in the case of investing, not succumbing to the urge to check your brokerage account when the market is down.

Are these small and arguably meaningless examples? Absolutely. But that's the point.

Becoming exceptional, while not necessarily complicated, is a process. Small tests steel you for bigger ones. They elevate your consciousness in the face of adversity and fuel your willingness to seek out and conquer new challenges.

In Richard Sherman's case, this was prevailing in the face of Compton's ubiquitous culture of violence. In Phil Knight's case, it was prevailing over a deeply entrenched and well-financed industry.

What's it going to be in your case?

Leno says goodbye again

BURBANK, Calif. » Jay Leno has said goodbye to "The Tonight Show" before, but not like this. The comedian became tearful and choked up Thursday as he concluded what he called the "greatest 22 years of my life."

"I am the luckiest guy in the world. This is tricky," said an emotional Leno, stepping down for the second and presumably last time as host of TV's venerable late-night program. Jimmy Fallon takes over "Tonight" in New York on Feb. 17.

Leno shared that he'd lost his mother the first year he became "Tonight" host, his dad the second and then his brother.

"And after that I was pretty much out of family. And the folks here became my family," he said of the crew and staff of "Tonight."

It was a tender finish to a farewell show that was mostly aiming for laughs, with traditional monologue jokes, clips from old shows and a wild assortment of celebrities helping to usher Leno out the door.

Leno first departure came in 2009, when he was briefly replaced by Conan O'Brien but reclaimed the show after a messy transition and O'Brien's lackluster ratings. In '09, he was moving to a prime-time show on NBC; this time he's out the door, and has said he'll focus on comedy clubs and his beloved car collection.

Looking sharp in a black suit and bright blue tie, Leno was greeted by an ovation from the VIP audience. The typically self-contained comic betrayed a bit of nervousness, stumbling over a few lines in his monologue.

He didn't trip over his opening line, though — a final dig at his employer.

"You're very kind," he told the audience. "I don't like goodbyes. NBC does."

Leno brought his show full circle with Billy Crystal, who was his first guest in May 1992 and his last guest Thursday. Crystal played ringmaster at one point, calling on Oprah Winfrey, Jack Black, Kim Kardashian, Carol Burnett and others for a musical tribute to Jay with a "Sound of Music" song parody.

"So long, farewell, auf wiedersehen, goodbye. If Fallon tanks you'll be back here next year," sang Jack Black.

"The Big Bang Theory" star Jim Parson's contribution: "We've watched you when we're weary. Your great success is called the big chin theory."

In a videotaped segment, celebrities offered career advice to Leno.

"Why would I give am (expletive) about what he does. He's a grown man," said Mark Walberg.

President Barack Obama, like other politicians a favorite target of Leno's, struck back in his clip.

"Jay, you've made a whole lot of jokes about me over the years, but don't worry, I'm not upset," Obama said, then said he was making Leno the U.S. ambassador to Antarctica. "Hope you have a warm coat, man."

Crystal sang Leno's praises during the show, saying the late-night host made America feel a little better at bedtime and invoking his predecessor, Johnny Carson. Leno's "Tonight" tenure was second in length only to Carson's 30 years.

"You were handed the baton by one of the all-time greats. But once it was in your grasp, you ran the race," Crystal said. He and Leno, longtime friends, reminisced about the old days, with Leno recalling how Crystal and other comedians visiting his town, Boston, stayed in Leno's apartment.

"You're calling it an apartment. I'm calling it a bomb site," Crystal joked.

Leno told how he was poised to make his network debut on Dean Martin's show in 1974 when news came that President Richard Nixon had resigned in the Watergate scandal. Leno's appearance didn't happen.

"Making me the last guy screwed by Nixon," Leno said.

Garth Brooks performed his touching song "The Dance" before Leno's farewell remarks. "Now that I brought the room down," Leno joked, he asked Brooks to lighten it up.

Another Brooks' song, "Friends in Low Places," closed out the show.

***

Dave congratulates Jay.

Conan?  Not so much.

I wouldn't mind one more appearance with Dave.

should we save poor children?

Will saving poor children lead to overpopulation?

No.  It's the other way around says Hans Rosling.